I, Me…

… do solemnly swear that I:

  • like turtles
  • will not do sit-ups on the bed and count that as “working out”
  • need to start looking more closely at the food that I pick up off the floor before I put it into my mouth
  • will stop eating cereal right before laying down for bed… Guurrgh, MILK BELLY… *gurgle*gurgle*blorp*mrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrobbbbbbbbb*
  • should kill less bugs starting now for the karmic benefits. Retribution for all the senseless years of slaughter CAN start today…
  • must cease and desist from being such a GD MFing internet hipster snob and just effing WRITE again and not give an effing eff about the shitty shorty shirtsleeves I think I’ve been dealt which cripples me and makes me want to see if I can outsleep my cat or all the brazillion reasons I have for not doing it and doing something else or usually just doing nothing and then feeling overly guilty about it instead of just “normally” guilty and basically just be a human-GD-being. Who writes. On the internet. When I’m not too busy self hating and being depressed about nothing and everything all at once. JK! LOL! OTFLASLOLFOJ!*
The End.

*on the floor laughing and simultaneously letting out little farts of joy!


Filed under (me), just a thought...

2 responses to “I, Me…

  1. Nolz

    Do you also solemnly swear that you are up to no good?

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