the bee: You can go on into the bathroom first this morning.
m: Well, thanks and all but it’s just so CA-CA-CA-COLD in there. *jitterbugs around the bed in a fetal position to really drive home the point*
b: *slowly turns body in opposite direction*
m: I wish you could air kick me like the Transporter into the bathroom so I wouldn’t have to touch the cold tiles.
b: Do what now? Like who?
m: You KNOW. Like the Transporter. Jason Statham. He is like a master of air kicks.
b: What are “air kicks?”
m: You’re kidding me, right?
b: But aren’t all kicks “air kicks”?
m: Pffffffffffffffffffft. No.
Air kicks are when you are specially trained in martial arts or something and you can make your body fly through the air with your legs shooting straight out, readied like a fist so you can kick-fist someone in the face.
b: Wouldn’t that be called a “flying kick” then?
m: I doubt it. Jason Statham can’t fly, but birds can. Flies can fly. Even planes can fly. You know why? Because they have wings. Jason Statham does not have wings, therefore he cannot “fly kick“, he air kicks.
b: Well, since you’ve presented your case with such an overwhelming amount of logic and reason, I suppose I have no other option but to agree with you.
m: I’m glad I could help you come to your senses.
One, Two, Three… aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand GO!