Well, it’s shaping up to be a regular BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH week for blogging. Although I had intended on making another Lenny & Lloyd comic for this week’s post, my wrist started giving me trouble which then led to a loss of sensation in part of my hand which resulted in a diagnosis of CTS from my doctor. So now I’m splinted up and having some difficulty just typing.
I know, I know. Boo to the Hoo.
Hey! You know what I haven’t complained about it awhile?
And guess what?
It still BLOWS.
Things are bad everywhere and corporate America is no exception.
When you are the low whoa-man on the totem pole at a place like the one I work for, the only place to go is OUT. As in look elsewhere for employment because the job you’ve got now probably won’t even exist in a few years and lord knows you’re deluded if you think a promotion is even a possibility in your future.
Because it’s not.
They may feed you a decent helping of bullshit to keep you “hanging in there” but the truth is there’s nothing better for you down the line. Sure, they want you to think that there is, because they don’t want to lose the work horses they have while there’s still work to be done.
Maybe you’ve been working there for 20 years. Well don’t think just because you spent the better part of your lifetime slaving away for some soul-eating giant that they’re gonna give a shit about you when the lay-off fairy comes a callin’.
There’s risk involved with any job: corporate, non-profit, independent, etc… but there’s a big difference between faltering due to your own mis-steps as opposed to getting shit-canned because some 6-figure making asshole decides that the best way to save his horribly mis-managed company is by making you redundant.
I’m not trying to say one is worse than the other, because being out of work is the same no matter how you slice it, but I know that I’d rather be the one responsible for my career failures as opposed to some big-wig in a leather chair sending me a pink-slip via our company’s intranet.
This afternoon I have an inter-departmental meeting to attend.
Kill me. NOW.
What makes this meeting unlike the others I typically attend is that it’s like HOURS long (2 1/2 to be exact) and it’s mandatory, which leads me to believe that some shit may be or is currently on its way to hitting the proverbial fan. The sorry thing is that I’m kind of hoping for “bad news”.
This is how much I hate what I do: I’d rather face a lay-off at a time when I have no other means of income or another job in the pipeline than continue working where I do.
You might be thinking: What the fuck is WRONG with you?! Why don’t you just look for another job, asshole?
Well, I guess where I’m at now is that I have looked and I don’t want just another job. If my only options for future employment are based around the work experience I already have acquired (customer service, retail sales, copy center employee) I think I’d rather live out of a cardboard box in my parent’s flooded basement.
Which only leaves me with one option: I need to take a risk.
I’ve never been good with the prospect of risk-taking. I have low self-esteem and because of it I usually talk myself out of things before I even get the chance to fail. Not to say I’ve not had my fair share of failure, because if falling down in a room full of semi-professional dancers, literally YEARS after you’ve last set foot in a dance studio, during an audition to become a cast member on a Disney Cruise ship isn’t failure well then I-DON’T-KNOW-WHAT-IS.
But seriously folks, it’s GO time. Now or never. Gotta make this happen or fall prey to the vicious corporate machine which will inevitably spit me out more bitter and jaded than I am already.
I may have labeled myself as “lazy” in the past but that’s not entirely true.
More like a half-truth.
I can be lazy. I REVEL in laziness from time to time because, DAMMIT, it feels good to do nothing sometimes. However, when crunch time comes around and I’m down to the wire, I can always count on myself to get the job done. Whatever it is.
In short, I’m a highly successful procrastinator. Some of my best work has been done just moments before it was due.
At least in my opinion…
Which is why I am sort of hoping you’ll help me in wishing for “the worst” for me today at this meeting. Keep your candles burning that some bad news for the department will be delivered which will leave me out of a job here and FORCED to take a much-needed mother-effing-risk in my life.
Otherwise, I fear I will sit complacent in front of this keyboard that has given me little more than a crippled wrist for another 3 years or so just because it’s paying the bills.
In other-news-about-things-I-actually-accomplished-this-week-that-don’t-include-complaining, I acted as guest photographer on the bee’s blog yesterday while he was down with the sickness.
So, scoot your boot on over there and check it out.
Mormon hugs & three-toed sloth open mouth kisses to you all!
Oh, and just so this post isn’t TOTALLY random:
It’s now after the meeting and I’m still totally employed.