You may have read what I wrote the other day about our war against the leggy leap-happy freaks in our home.
It was intended to be funny but the fact of the matter is that this situation is anything but.
Each morning I awake prepped and readied for battle:
Since writing of my insect woes not a day has passed without encountering a multitude of these vile bastards. Just this morning I had a rather large hopper leap towards me while I was in the bathroom. The one good thing about this interaction was I learned that cave crickets are highly irritated by the sound of shrill screams.
and jumping up and down in front of it, it quickly changed its course of direction, retreating to creeper sanctuary a.k.a. the nearest darkened corner of the room.
Either I’m going to become the most fearless and brave bug warrior there ever was or I will succumb to their infestation long before the summer begins.
I’m leaning towards the latter being the more realistic scenario.
Please know, if you are reading this, that I love you and you are all invited to my funeral.
For those of you concerned about scheduling conflicts, I predict it will occur sometime around mid-June.
If I’m lucky.
I had some ideas for today’s post but this week’s events have sort of caused me to lose some focus. Also, I’ve been working on pieces for other sites, hopefully ones that will actually get picked up/generate some cash-ola.
If not? (me) and the bee readers will be subjected to all my reject material!
How awesome for you!!!
In the spirit of giving, I’ve decided to use today’s post to pimp-out some hardworking bloggers and their sites which I just ADORE:
Alex & Mina are so frikkin’ cute and (me) and the bee are super jealous of all their awesome adventures.
Oh, and they take a ton of pictures. AMAZING pictures.
Schmutzie was my first ever blog friend and I will always love her for that. She is also ridiculously talented and generous and hosts FiveStarFriday for other bloggers to submit the superb works of their peers. Check it out, yo.
David Thorne is probably the most wickedly funny guy of ever. You will be thanking me later for this, no doubt.
Allie just might have the all-around funniest site on the interwebz. I am totally addicted to her. Visit once and you’ll be too.
MamaPop hosts some of the wittiest and thought provoking pop culture related content on Innernet. They also have a dream-team staff comprised of some of the best writers in blog-land.
Mepsipax’s site is titled Adventures of Being a Dick. Kind of self-explanatory. And awesome.
The Unqualified Economist was one of my earliest blogging allies and a great source for humor and headlines.
Saving the best for last…
In case you STILL didn’t believe me, I now have photographic evidence of the little fuckers running all sorts of ‘a-muck’ in our home:
Do you see this crap?
IS. NOT. FUNNY.
We set these traps yesterday afternoon and this is just what was collected OVERNIGHT.
What you see in that trap are just BABIES. Teeny-tiny stupid little baby hoppers who didn’t know any better and were baited into their sweet-sweet death by sugary poison. The adult hoppers obviously know better and are currently lying in wait inside my shoes and in my underwear drawer planning their revenge for our killing their offspring.
We are amidst an invasion of epic proportions.
That was just one of the traps we set.
You should have seen the one by the fireplace…
For the final part to the story, click here.