Hey! NYC?! You can SUCK. IT.

Last Friday we headed on over to evil-hell-succubus-town* New York City to attend some highfalutin super-swank gallery exhibit on Harinezumi photography at the New Museum. As you may already know, the bee has been posting exclusively from his Zumi since he started his blog back in January. Of course, if you’ve been following his blog you also know that, sadly,  All Zumi’s Go To Heaven… 


the bee was alllllllllll sorts of excited, and I can’t say I blame him. Here was his first/maybe only chance to hob-knob with other Zumi enthusiasts, view their photography, sneak some shots of celebs, network and more than likely embarrass ourselves. 

Because that’s how we roll, yo… 

This was an exclusive invite only exhibit but the bee had gotten the go-ahead from one of the organizers to come on over. 

How-EVER, the guy warned that, so far, the event had received 4 times the amount of RSVPs that they could accommodate. 

His suggestion? 

Get there are early as possible. 

Since it was scheduled to start at 6:30 we knew we would have to haul ass if we planned to make it in time. 

We both sped home from our mind-numbingly awful 9-5 prisons of doom jobs that afternoon with the intent on leaving the house no later than 5:30. 

That part of the plan? 

TOTAL success. 

For once in our lives it looked as though we were actually going to be on time/early for something! 


After sitting in bumper to bumper traffic just waiting to get into the Holland Tunnel from New Jersey, what started as us making good time, quickly turned into us realizing the inevitability of our defeat. 

Once we FINALLY made into shit-city we found ourselves in a veritable cluster-fuck of cars that seemed to be having some sort of block party in the middle of the street because god KNOWS they weren’t in the business of actually GOING anywhere. It took us another 30 minutes to maneuver through the labyrinthine gridlock until we finally made it to the New Museum… 

at 7:45. 

This is what it looked like as we made our approach: 


Some well known facts about hipsters: 

Hipsters like to wear sunglasses. Even at night. 

Especially at night… 



All I really know is these folks were ded-i-CATED because they were lined up to get into this place 2 blocks deep by the time we got there. 


we did what we had to do! 

We cut our losses and went back home… 

Turns out we regretted that choice almost immediately once we found ourselves sitting in traffic, yet again, just to get back into the tunnel to New Jersey. 

It was at that moment that I asked the bee: 

Can we, like, NEVER not EVER again come back to this place? 

Because it was then that I realized, most un-popularly, that I… ? 

Do not love NY. 

who's laughin' now, bitch?!

 Not even slightly. 

I toyed with saying that I hate NY but thought better of it because that would be giving that *place more emotional investment than it deserves. 


In a true move of the ironic… 

guess who dressed like a total hipster that day? 



Filed under (me), just a thought..., the bee

3 responses to “Hey! NYC?! You can SUCK. IT.

  1. Ha. In times like these, public transport is your friend. :)

  2. so true. from now on, that will be the ONLY way we go. *IF* we ever go again…

  3. Jared

    That was great Steff, I’m LMAO. Love this blog.

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