The Lost Weekend (brought to you courtesy of power outages, cabin fever and poop) *UPDATED* x 3!!!

You may already be aware that my regularly scheduled weekend programing was quite RUDELY interrupted by a friggin’ UNREAL rainstorm of catastrophic proportions which uprooted a giant tree and then flopped it, wholly inconveniently, on top of the power lines on my street. 

So, yeah. 

Since Saturday, around 2:30 in the PM we have not had any power in the house. 

Ok, ya’ll, let’s hear that collective wail: 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!! Naht mah innernets!!! 

Needless to say, I have been like a chicken with its head cut off or a blogger with no hands. 

Really, whichever is more disturbing to your senses. 

Because that’s the kind of place I’m in right now. 

in case you can't tell, the clock is set to 'half past crazy'

 I haven’t showered or brushed my teeth (which admittedly, was more by stubborn choice than inability to do so) and we’ve been told that power will not be restored until Tuesday. 

Here is a brief pictorial rundown of my physical deterioration since Saturday: 

 

 

Along with having no power and no innernets,  black-outs cause a loss of running water when it is sourced from a well. 

This means, not only do sinks and showers not work, but neither do toilets. 

How cool is THAT?! 

So when I woke up this morning and needed to get on with a particular part of my morning routine, I found myself in a bit of a predicament. 

Since Saturday, I’d done fairly well with seeking out other outlets for excrement deposit.  

Our toilet is currently filled with a obscene amount of nasty, smelly pee water and toilet paper and being that I have no clue when we will actually get full functionality back, I decided that poo-ing in the toilet and letting it fester was not the best plan. 

So I did what I had to do. 

 

I pooped in a trashcan. 

Updates to follow…

UPDATE:

Tuesday morning.

You know when someone jokes “What’d ya get dressed in the dark or something?” when you don’t look particularly fabulous and put together?

Well, I can honestly say that, yes, today that is exactly what happened.

As of my departure to work @ 7:30 this morning power had still not been restored but we’ve been assured by the Elec Comp that things should be back up and running by 10PM tonight.

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight…

UPDATE Part Deuce:

Tuesday evening.

9:00 PM, power restored!!!

This is an infinitely good thing, HOWEVER…

being that the power was not back up until 9, which any savvy American Idol fan would know was a full hour AFTER the show started, I missed the first half and therefore the recap will have to be put on hiatus/cancelled depending on my lack of motivation after work to scour the web for the performances I missed.

So.

I know you are crying on the inside AND out just wondering how you will ever get on with life without having the most awesome of all Idol recaps to read at your leisure today, but I assure you I will make it up to you somehow.

Even if it means putting my second poop post of the week on hold just to get the recap finished before the results show on Thursday.

UPDATE the 3rd:

The Idol results are on tonight, NOT Thursday.

If I do get a chance it will likely be a fast talking Micro Machines man inspired recap.

No promises…

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8 Comments

Filed under (me), home

8 responses to “The Lost Weekend (brought to you courtesy of power outages, cabin fever and poop) *UPDATED* x 3!!!

  1. Nikki

    You had me cracking up at this. Hope it come on before tomorrow!!!! Once again we’re here if you need a shower or a toilet!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Paul

    Only someone as imaginative and clever as you could turn an otherwise miserable set of circumstances into a comedic event. Keep putting it out there (not the evacuation!!) and save some of those wilderness skills for spring camping! luv ya.

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  5. I read about it some days ago in another blog and the main things that you mention here are very similar

  6. Very shorts, simple and easy to understand, bet some more comments from your side would be great

  7. Kesha Vandiford

    your new share!

  8. Pingback: Waterworld. Except subtract the part about water. And don’t expect any Kevin Costner references either… | me and the bee

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